Dear LITC,
I like your blog and how you are comfy with exposing your
life for us to learn about and even inspire us. My girl and I are having this
argument and I want your point of view. We been together like 3 years and some
change now and I asked her how she felt about a threesome in the future. She
hit me back with the what about us having an open relationship or both of us
being allowed to get it in with other females. I admit I am kinda shocked and
all but on the real should I be worried she is cheating or has been
entertaining other females? Am I not enough for her anymore?
-Dee The Stud
Hi Dee, thanks for your letter and I apologize for the
delay in posting. None the less, I’ll happily share my opinion with you and
please keep in mind my thoughts and views on this topic has changed but that’s
what we do: Grow & Evolve. Speaking of which, your girlfriend may have
changed her views since you two first got together…and that’s perfectly normal
as we get deeper into relationships. Have you two had this discussion before?
If so was she against the idea of a threesome or has she always been open to
polyamory/open relationships?
In my 20’s the idea of an open relationship seemed
pointless to me but now I have to admit that hell I’d love to have my own
girlfriend or have a monogamous triad. And believe it or not, Nina is open to
it as well. My reasoning is because I like the idea of sexual adventures with
others while still enjoying and maintaining my primary relationship. It doesn’t
mean I love Nina any less, I just like the ability to miscellaneous thrills as
well. This may not be your girlfriends thinking, or it may be what she has
always been feeling.
Should you be worried? I always say trust your gut
feeling. If you think there is something going on, there is something going on.
Don’t discredit your gut. Are you enough? Of course you are, there is no way a
sane woman would remain in a relationship for three years with someone who she
doesn’t view as enough…and if she does then she is just flat out STUPID!
What I suggest is you two sit down and have a heart to
heart talk about your wants, needs, and desires. Keep the communication open on
both ends and if you two desire the same things i.e. threesomes, open
relationships, etc then talk about how this will seriously affect your
relationship going forward. By all means please do not use these avenues as a
way to fix or heal any internal problems the two of you are having as they only
in disaster and heartache.
Good Luck to both of you and I hope everything works out
for the best.
Lesbian In The City Fans, what do you think? How do you
feel about Open Relationships and Polyamory? Speak Up, Speak Out!
